Sunday, April 10, 2011

How to Live Happy-Choose not to be offended

Second Challenge Choose Not To Be Offended. This challenge is a lot more difficult than the first one. But I have been thinking about it a lot, especially because of some circumstances in my life more recently. This lesson for me really started when I first got married, we had just moved into a ward and I had volunteered to do nursery for some activity. there were a couple other Sisters there and I tried to talk with them, but the main one talking made it clear she really wasn't interested in talking to me. A few weeks go by and our ward had its Christmas Party, when Glenn and I walked in, there were a lot of tables with places on them to sit. We had made some friends and I was looking forward to making more. But the far table had the most room on it and it just happened to have that girl at the table and what are the odds but that was where Glenn wanted to sit. I kind of groaned a little and asked if we could sit anywhere else, and I have never seen Glenn look at me so disappointed. And so I said we could go sit by her and we did. Afterward we talked about it and he did not believe me that she was rude to me. He said he was sure she didn't mean it on purpose or anything. And I KNEW she did. While we were discussing it, Glenn pretty much said "Why can't you just assume the best of people?" He taught me a lesson to CHOOSE not to think that someone was trying to slight you. Even if you KNOW that they were, just react and live like they didn't even if they DID mean to do what they did. Glenn really is my best example of this, he really never gets offended or hurt by others and he ALWAYS thinks the best of other people. It was a little bit of a tricky lesson to learn because all growing up girls realize that other girls are mean and we have had personal experience, so we watch carefully for the subtle ways in which other girls insult us. I have been trying really hard to not be offended about stuff that other people do to me or if I think someone did something wrong, unfair, or unkind to me and I feel so much happier because of it!! It is actually really nice to not waste my energy getting all riled up and just forgiving someone as soon if not before it even happens. Having that quick forgiveness has, I know it seems a funny way to explain it, but it has lightened my life a little bit. It took a little time, and I am sure it isn't a perfect attribute for me yet, but I am working on it and I can see the difference it has made so far! I hope I can continue to CHOOSE not to be offended in any situation that is placed in my life. and I think that our wards and our families would be so much better off if we were all trying to master this concept. Good Luck to those who will try this one, don't give up if it doesn't come easy!!! Elder Bednar said, "Through the strengthening power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ, you and I can be blessed to avoid and triumph over offense." (CR Nov 2006) I know this to be true, if we exercise Charity towards others our feelings of hurt and anger can be washed away.


Shelise said...

Funny, just today something happened and I was going over and over it in my head. I was really hurt, you know? But then I thought, "Shelise, if you ever want to grow you need to get over this and move on with life." This is a really hard one for me. I guess I just take things personally, but when I see someone doing the same thing over and over to me I start to realize its on purpose and that they really are trying to be rude. I think for me its one thing when I know someone probably doesn't realize that they are hurting me or whatever. BUT its totally different when I feel like its on purpose. It makes it harder to get over. Especially when its regarding my children.

These are great Chrissy.

Oh and I just realized I am the worst friend ever and forgot to email you about the movie thing. Sorry. Once we got back from Vegas a week or so ago, my mind shifted into moving mode and I have thought of little else since. So, sorry. I didn't mean to ignore that.

.Chrissy said...

Shelise-when it is about your own children, that really is much harder!! Your response to it was awesome though!
and thanks!
and no problem!! Let us know when it would work for you! and really if you ever need to send the boys away to get something done a little more quickly they can come here!! Really!